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Yes, You Actually Do Know!

Stop saying “I don’t know”, because, yes, you actually DO know!

How often each day do you say “I don’t know” in a day? What situations do you say “I don’t know” in?

As a coach, especially, the phrase “I don’t know” drives me crazy! Because, let’s be honest - you actually DO know!

In fact, in many cases, ONLY you know!

I’ve found three main times when I say “I don’t know”

  1. A throw away phrase
  2. Want someone else to tell you the answer
  3. You don’t want to admit the answer to yourself

Saying “I don’t know” is a HABIT, not a TRUTH! And, frankly, it can be lazy or it can be dishonest or out of integrity to yourself!

  1. A throw away phrase
    1. When you just want to move on - usually you unconsciously change the subject after throwing this lob out
    2. What are you not saying?
      1. Are you not giving your opinion on something?
    3. What are you avoiding?
      1. Are you avoiding giving your opinion or are you avoiding the topic?
    4. Notice when you use “I don’t know” in this way
  2. Want someone else to tell you the answer
    1. You are basically giving up your own power
    2. You are saying that your opinion is not worthy of being heard!
  3. You don’t want to admit the answer to yourself
    1. THIS one hit me hard last night!!
      1. I was with an RMT/Energy Worker last night and she asked me a question that I KNOW the answer to, but am not ready to execute it
      2. I responded with “I don’t know”, and she busted me!! Of course, she responded with: “Of course you know!” And she asked me the question again.
      3. Then she asked me if it felt Light or Heavy
        1. Light = Yes
        2. Heavy = No
      4. Obviously, the answer was Yes, but “I don’t know” was my answer because I am not yet ready to admit it to myself fully, and actually take action on the answer

So here’s the practice:

Anytime you catch yourself saying, or about to say, “I don’t know”, take a breath and check in with what it is you actually want to or NEED to say.

  • Do you need to ask a question to gain more clarity/insight/information?
  • Do you have an opinion that you are worried may not be responded to kindly?
  • Do you need an extra moment (or many) to find the answer for yourself?
  • Do you, actually, want someone else’s opinion on something that you are struggling with?

My guess, is that you actually DO KNOW, but you are either 1) in the habit of saying “I don’t know” or 2) you are worried to share your opinion.

You are WORTHY of speaking up! Your opinions DO MATTER!

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